Fuck nice

Apparently, I walk into a room like I own it.
This, according to some of my new computer
tech friends I've been training with. They are
all quite young, 18-22, in fact. I do well with
that demographic.

Here I go again making a new generation of
friends who think I'm cool, but who will likely
find some major personality flaw in me shortly
that they can despise. It's funny really, in that
not at all funny kind of way that guys like me
live on and on like some fat immortal meeting
new people who are a lot like other people I know.
Anyone who likes me usually doesn't do so right away.
They usually have to "figure out" after a few days or
couple of weeks that I am smarter than I look or
more expressive than they thought I'd be. Then I fuck
it up by getting annoyed with them or arguing about
some bullshit that doesn't matter.

In the end, I'm just not a very nice guy. I don't aspire to
being nice, because I don't see nice and good as the
same thing. I'm sure there were some very nice people
living near Dachau, but that didn't do anybody living IN
Dachau any good, did it?

Some of the worst fucking people I've ever known were
"nice." Matt the secret necrophiliac, Todd the poser fuck
and his mother the Indian hatin' bitch, Mrs. Smoley the
newspaper teacher who wanted me to find Jesus, but did
nothing when she heard I ran away from home ... except
make me stay after school to listen to her preach.

Because I have a low frustration threshold, I can't be teased
because I have issues from WAY back. I ultimately cannot trust
anyone who likes me because I hate myself and can't
possibly be wrong about that. Can I?