The long, dark water intoxication of the soul

A California woman died this week trying to win a Wii video
game system for her kids. Read the whole story here.

Contestants at a radio station were trying to "hold their wee for a Wii." They
started off drinking small bottles of water every 15 minutes
just to see who could hold out for the longest. The winner
won a Wii game system. The loser in this case got a massive
headache and died from hydro intoxication. It's real and it
happens. But what a stupid way to die for such a stupid thing.

I had mixed feelings about this issue. As a guy whose avocation
it is to comment on stories like this, I'd like to blame someone
or criticize something but who or what? Sure it's a stupid contest
based entirely around the notion that Wii sounds like wee.
Yes, it's dumb to have a water drinking/pee holding contest
but you wouldn't expect anyone to die from it. I mean, if
people don't die in hot dog eating contests, why would you
expect someone to die from drinking water and not peeing?
So even if this had been my idea, I think I'd have gotten passed
the guilt pretty quickly. No one was forced to do anything
against their will.

Then you kind of think it's nice that this woman was doing this
for her kids when she succumbed to death. But then you
quickly realize that not all acts of self sacrifice are equal. She didn't die
trying to save her kids from Nazis. She didn't die trying to
steal food for her kids. She didn't even die in traffic on her
way to work, which could be seen as a kind of noble sacrifice.
She died for a third-rate game system that her kids probably
just thought they had to have. But still I can't blame this woman
for wanting to do something stupid to win a game system for her
kids. We don't all get the chance to truly sacrifice for our kids
by saving them from sheer horror so it's nice that we can suffer
some discomfort to express our love.

But then I realized that this doesn't make me think so much about
the sacrifice of parents so much as it does how God damn selfish
kids can be. And yes that does include some of the crap I've pulled
in my life, though I have to say I'm an angel compared to some. I
suppose it's the nature of kids to try and get all they can get. It's
some kind of survival instinct that forces the weak and runty to
die. It's why older kids pick on the little ones and why if you
are pouring out to glasses of pop both kids will claim to be getting
the one with less in it. They start of crying to be held and fed
and end up crying that you didn't get them the Sims 2 expansion
pack they wanted. They turn their noses up at a $10 gift certificate
these days or a book. Or 23 hours worth of mp3s loving downloaded
and burned by hand. Or good advice.

It's hard to make an impression on kids. They have too much
stuff and not enough to do. As lazy and unused to work as I was a kid,
I worked like a slave compared to how under-worked kids are today. I walked
beans, bailed hay, milked cows, worked construction, washed dishes,
cut gladiolas (harder than it sounds) and flipped burgers.

Each entitled generation has less to do, fewer needs and more luxuries
to pine for. What an empty existence. It's not even better to give than
to receive in this case. One can get no joy from giving to someone who
thinks you could have done a lot better than you did when you did
a lot better for them than anyone ever did for you, at least in terms of
dollar amounts. I'd kill for someone to spend a buck fifty on a gift for
me that is actually meaningful.

And so we have one dead mother who died having a lark in order
to win a third-rate game system for kids whose first thought
upon hearing the bad news was "Why couldn't it have been an
Xbox 360?"