I believe in miracles, birth just isn't one of them

People often refer to "the miracle of birth." That's a bit over-the-top,
don't you think? Typically, miracles are things that don't happen
hundreds of thousands of times a day, you know? I don't doubt that
having a baby hurts, takes a lot out of you or that it is a monumental
occasion in your life, but it's still not a miracle ... especially where
people are concerned. Even though we mostly give birth to one live
offspring at a time, we have still managed to over-populate the planet
like nothing else. That's impressive, but hey, rats have litters of six and
up. Rats can have several litters a year. Rats can be great-great-great
grandparents before they die in as short as three years time.

Elephants carry their fetuses for over a year. Pandas have a hell of a
time conceiving at all. Whales getting it on, can you imagine what must
go into that?

No, birth is no miracle. It's pretty common. Just walk into any mall
or grocery store in the country and see just how NOT miraculous
birth is. It would be a miracle of some of these mouth-breathers
DIDN'T have kids. And is there a category GREATER than "miracle"
for someone who can actually control their kids? I think so.

Happy Mother's Day, y'all!